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Writer's pictureHarini (yarnamour)

An end and a beginning

After almost 7 years of working as a software engineer, there came a time when it drained me out completely. A job that I once loved was now becoming more unbearable with every passing day. The computer that I loved so much was now a depressing sight. I needed some time off it and I did not want to know the date and time of when I must rejoin work. I was left with the only option: to quit.


So now I remembered about wanting to try dyeing yarn seriously. I wanted to give this a try, take that big leap of faith and start working towards this dream. But where do I start?

1. Yarn?

2. Dye?

3. Process?

4. Finances?

5. Plans? (But what to plan?)

6. Was there something that I was missing? (there definitely must be something. It can't be that smooth after all, isn't it)


I was confused. I was in the middle of nowhere. It felt like I was making a horrible decision for myself. It felt like I was going to make things challenging for me rather than just continuing that high paying IT job.


I opened my OneNote (this is my favourite Office tool even now) and started writing down my business idea. As I explored it, things started to fall into place. I figured out what my next steps should be and the ways I can go about them.


Following just those weren't easy either. For example, suppliers aren't easy to talk to when you are just beginning. They don't even consider you as a real person and you don't even have any prior work to show-off.


It felt it was easier to give up on this rather than continuing. I had to pick myself up after every disappointing meetings or followups, tell myself that they're all gonna be worth it sometime. This was getting much more difficult than I had anticipated.


Mind you, I still hadn't quit my job at this point. I needed a bigger push to take this dream forward without getting diverted. What did I do? I resigned from my day job.


After I resigned, I couldn't prepare much during my 2 month long notice period because they were making me work my ass off. So around this time last year, when I was finally free to work on my dream project, I started.


I hit another roadblock ie., myself. Yes. I landed in a lot of self doubts and insecurities. Took me weeks to get out of it and boy this was hell lot of work.


It's now time to mention the husband support. One could say that I own and run my business and that I don't have to answer anyone, but I have my husband for a boss (a boss who I didn't really ask for😜). He let me do whatever I wanted but he'd be really annoying when he asks for status updates randomly and frequently and especially at times when you are low (reason: things aren't working out easily). I'd get disappointed a lot trying to answer his questions. They were all very valid and my progresses would be extremely slow. I'd break down many times telling him that I'm not made for this and that I'm clueless again.


All these uncomfortable questioning sessions brought me out of my comfort zone and made me work to answer those questions. He's my mentor in finances. The price of every product of yarnamour is not a random number. It includes various components and he was the one who taught me how to set prices. Today, I've grown to a point where he doesn't have to question me anymore. I give him proactive updates.😂 I discuss all my business ideas with him first. I strongly believe that his criticisms are the best for me. Oh BTW, he's a consultant tax lawyer. ☺️


Then I set a date for myself, the date to go live. It wasn't far. Just a week away. I had created some colorways that I liked, and I was sort-of ready to take that difficult first step of stepping into the limelight. The doubts and insecurities were still there. I knew I was missing out on a lot of stuff. I was ready to solve them as and when they appeared. I just did not let these feelings ruin it for me this time.


So on the evening of 17th September 2021, I finally created a new Instagram page called 'yarnamour'.

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